Saturday after watching my weight climb up to 273 lbs I realized that I needed to stop experimenting and go back to what I know works. I’ve tried paleo, whole30, just watching what I eat, and Primal blueprint. Previously I had huge success using Herbalife, counting calories, and exercising so that’s what I’m back to. So far it’s going really well. I’m doing my 1 week weigh in on Saturday. I will update going forward.
On another note….. I’m planning a weekend camping trip “up Nort” for this summer and I am super excited!
Current Stats: 271.4 lbs, reading The Turn, feeling excited, waiting for it to be warmer
Today I read something that really struck a cord with me. I’m currently reading”Strong looks better naked” by Khloe Kardashian. In her chapter about making the best of everything Khloe shares her Mantra “The soul becomes dyed with the color of our thoughts and I want to paint my soul in vivid and bright colors”. I love this! I want my soul to be bright and vivid! If every choice I make is with positive thoughts and every action is out of love won’t that nurture my soul? If I do things that make me and everyone around myself happy will it not help my soul be bright and vivid? In a way I have been making small steps towards living this mantra without even knowing it!
I could feel my soul getting black and ugly. I was lashing out at people I care about. The weight of my responsibilities and obligations was getting to be too much for me. I was not carving out time in this life to take care of myself. After being particularly nasty to my husband one day I realized that I needed to make a change. I started doing yoga. I don’t go to a studio or have an instructor. I simply watch YouTube videos at home. Performing this small act and taking some time for myself has done an incredible amount to lift my spirits. I feel alive and grounded. I don’t feel like a “firecracker with a short fuse” like I have been called in the past. I can’t speak for my husband but I don’t feel like I am releasing all of my stresses out on him anymore either.
I’m hoping my Yoga practice will hold me over until the weather warms and I can start my training outdoors. Once outside training starts I want to keep up my practice. I feel most connected to myself when doing Yoga. Maybe I will even graduate to leaving my home and doing Yoga in a studio someday! We will see….. I tend to be a little flighty like a bird. Bouncing from idea to idea.
“You cannot always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside” -Wayne Dyer
Current Stats: Reading 100 quiet moments, weight 266, trying to eat mostly paleo, doing yoga everyday, missing my boys, working too much.
I don’t have much to say other than I’m giving it another try tomorrow. I’m going to give it my best shot. Even if it takes me 10 years to successfully complete a Whole30, each try I learn something about myself. I get closer to my goal. Since I will be re-starting again I did weigh myself this morning. I have lost 3.8 pounds since my first attempt. See every try gets me somewhere and one of these times I will get to my goal.
Isn’t that really what this journey is all about?…. working towards a goal? Whether it’s a goal of being more active or a goal weight, we are all working towards something.
Breakfast- 3 eggs and 1 banana
Lunch- Venison back strap and Broccoli
Dinner- Paleo Steak fajitas
Snacks- I can’t even stand to admit what I’ve done
Currently: 263.2 pounds, reading Relentless Spirit, eating a lot of eggs, 16 month old is crazy, Mom life is hard but the best, overall mental status is good, need more exercise, sleep deprived always, anxiously awaiting spring, and loving women’s running mag